My dear husband, Winston, had the great joy of spending the afternoon today with Liam solo. This was the VERY first time that Winston did not have me or anyone else with him to help with Liam. I wish I could express how nervous I was to leave him all alone with our little man...not that I didn't think he was capable, but because I see how he needs me to help support him when he has Liam in his lap. For example: we will be sitting on the couch, me on one side and Winston holding Liam on the other side. Liam would spit up, and Winston in his frantic state just freezes and yells, "I need a burp cloth! Jess, help me!" I typically stumble around our couch area in a fluster, frantically scanning the room for a burp rag, all because he is yelping. Although it is no serious emergency, Winston's reaction is to call for help, rather than grab the burp rag that was on the arm of the couch the entire time. After all spit-up is cleaned off both Liam and Winston, we sit and laugh at how frantic we get. It is times like these that come to mind that make me nervous to leave Liam and Winston alone. Who will help Winston get the burp cloth in a "state of emergency?"
So this afternoon I was off to my six-week postpartum doctor visit allllllll alone. There was no giant pregnant belly to move around, no awkward car seat to maneuver, and no diaper bag to struggle with. It was just me. And it was weird! I forget how quick life used to be when it was just me to worry about. So anyways, I had to go and have "the visit" where they do the lovely pap smear and give you the "go-ahead," even though my doctor never gave me the "go-ahead" at all. I sat there wondering if it was OK to resume normal activity, since he did not restrict me to do anything? Well, he did tell me to take it easy with abdominal exercises, but that was it!
When I returned home after hitting up the grocery store, I was happy to see that Winston was happily sitting on the couch browsing the Internet on his laptop, while Liam slumbered beside him in the boppy. Sure, there were dirty diapers on the ottoman-turned-impromptu-changing-table, and sure, there were burp rags slewn over the couch and floor, but all-in-all, everything was calm on the forefront. It didn't take too long for Liam to stir from his nap to let us know that he A) had a dirty diaper, B) was hungry, and C) had a terrible tummy ache. We dealt with B and C for the remainder of the evening. The poor little guy was off his feeding schedule, and his bout of bad gas did not lighten his mood. So, Winston and I spent the remainder of the afternoon doing all that we could to appease the little guy. I must say, it was kind of nice for Winston to see what a "fussy-baby-day" looks like! Now he knows how difficult it can be to get simple tasks done around the house while also dealing with a newborn! I felt terrible when I arrived home and had my own mini-meltdown...I was so irritable with the day! I was cranky because I didn't get much sleep, I was starving, I was light-headed due to the lack of food, I was cold from the freezing weather, I was wind-blown, and I was getting to the stage of engorgement and needed to pump. I crankily sat on the edge of the couch mumbling and bumbling to myself as I shoved left-over orzo into my mouth with one hand, while the other hand held my breast pump into place. Winston, who was proud of himself for making it through his first solo run with Liam, sat back and patiently let me spew and sputter about my aggravation with the people at the store...and the weather...and the hunger...and the everything else. Bless his heart, he was so patient and calm while I was a hot mess! It took me a few minutes, but I got over it. I told him that I had the opportunity to change my attitude and be positive, so I did. You must always keep in the sunlight, right? :)
Well, Liam is snoozing away and I am not far behind him. I ventured out of the house for the first time in a few days and I am worn out. We will see what tomorrow brings!
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